Pervasive Emptiness

file000253375816I truly am hoping I am not the only one with this. I understand we are all on our own journey, however I know they all cross from time to time. I am pretty sure these crossings allow us to help each other and show each other the way. It is a gift when we are on a path that we feel lost on and someone comes and leads us onward.

So here I am. This little pervasive emptiness is something that has lived at some level in my heart for quite some time. It shows up quite frequently filling my heart with a void that I have yet to figure out how to excuse permanently from my life.

I have searched for some time for a driving purpose in my life that extends beyond my little family. Something that I am passionate about that allows me to create, grow and learn. I have often thought and prayed about returning to work, simply for this purpose. Each time I do, I feel that I should not be away from my amazing kids. On that note, I am grateful for answered prayers, because I know He will guide me as many times as I ask.

I don’t understand why I feel this way. I don’t understand what I am searching for, when it seems like many around me have so much purpose in their lives. I simply don’t know where it look or how to find it. Sometimes writing heals my heart and I find answers in the words that come out. I truly hope that one day I will be writing and the answer will come. I feel like I am on a roller coaster…one day I am up and can conquer the world and the next 5 days I am struggling to do the basics. I pray for a time when it will all balance out and I can find the place that brings me the purpose I seek.

I guess we are all on this journey to learn more about who we are and what we are meant to be. I would love to understand who He wants and needs me to be so that I can move forward with that purpose. I will just have faith that His answers will come when they are meant to. I just need to keep looking….


  1. Wendy you write beautifully! I have been reading these posts and you are so descriptive and eloquent in your words. I think you are EXACTLY what and where you need to be at this point in your journey…a mom to your beautiful children. “There is a time and season to all things.” The world puts so much pressure on us to be more, do more, achieve more! But in return we find ourselves further away from the priorities in our lives that bring us the most happiness and joy. Our relationships. You’ll always be an amazing example and friend to me!! Love you girl!

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